You Know your a Great Dane Owner When ...

#1 visitors enter the house holding their privates protectively

#2 the pizza delivery people tell you to meet them at the end of the sidewalk

#3 you have given up on water dishes and you just use the bathtub

#4 you have to move over when brushing your teeth because your dog wants a drink

#5 it takes 3 people to get your dog on the scale at the vets

#6 you go to vacuum your car and most of the fur is up there on the ceiling

#7 you purchase a large screen TV and you still can't see the program when he stands in front of the television 

#8 the sound of running water makes you jump up and yell, "OUTSIDE!"

#9 your dog can hide an entire tennis ball (among other things) fully inside his lips and give you that innocent look that says, "What? I'm not eating anything!"

#10 you avoid the dogs on your way out the door, so they won't smear your makeup

#11 you walk your dog and everyone knows him by name, but you have no idea who these people are

#12 you keep at least one color-coded "drool towel" in every room of your house

#13 you've learned to force a smile when asked "do you have a saddle for that thing?"

#14 your dane strolls through the living room and everyone jumps to secure things to the coffee table.

#15 after banishing your husband, the snoring in your bedroom still keeps you awake

#16 while stopped at a stop light, everyone stares as your car rocks back and forth because the dog is panting out the window

#17 the donuts you put on top of the refrigerator are gone when you get home and your dog has powdered sugar on his nose

#18 the donuts you put on top of the refrigerator are gone when you get home and your dog has powdered sugar on his nose

#19 you take your dog for a ride and he rests his head on your arm, causing you to make random right turns

#20 your veterinarian has been able to put in a swimming pool, build a large home, buy jet skis and a personal plane

#21 the monthly dog budget exceeds your home mortgage payment

#22 you show a picture of your dogs and kids together, and the first person you point out is your dog

#23 your dog can see what you're cooking, and he tries to assist you in the preparation

#24 after surgery, your bored pup decides to get up and cruise around the vet's office-- pulling the rolling IV stand behind him 

#25 you can carry on a conversation with a dog's muzzle firmly in your crotch

#26 you are hiking with a friend who later suggests that you ought to have an environmental impact statement done on your dog

#27 you toss your dog a ball and cringe when he almost hits his head on the top of the doorway

#28 your dog stands in your lap and reaches over you to stick his head in the drive-through window at MacDonald's and nearly gives the cashier a heart attack when she turns around to give you your change

#29 you carry a tape measure with you when shopping for a new vehicle

#30 you have had to train your dog not to lick dishes, and the dishes are in the sink

#31 your two dogs decide to play in the house, and they end up pulling the ceiling fan down -- for the second time

#32 you have to hide your food in the microwave because that is the only place your dog can't get to it.